The Four “C”s: Consume, Create, Cavort, Commune
Four types of self-care to incorporate into your routines
Self-care doesn’t work if it’s an isolated thing. If you wait until you’re burnt out and that’s the only time you practice self-care, you’ll trap yourself in a cycle of burn out, rest, hustle, burn out, repeat.
I’ve also noticed that self-care really doesn’t work if the whole point is self-care. That may sound contradictory, but when you set aside time vaguely labeled as self-care, you’ll probably get caught up in all the aesthetics and the “supposed to’s” of it.
Helpful self-care needs to be woven into our routines in order to promote cycles of rest, rather than cycles of burn out. It also needs to emphasize the actual activity and what it does for you, rather than some vague portrait of rest and relaxation.
I came across a tumblr post (on Pinterest lol) that talked about coming across a video that talked about something called the four “C”s. I know, that’s quite a game of telephone, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.
The four “C”s
The four “C”s were: consume, create, cavort, and commune. This is not just a fun alliteration moment, it’s a short and snappy way to remember four ways to refill your tank.
Consume: The relaxation of taking in media other people made, like books, music, TV, etc.
Create: anything that falls under the act of creating with your own hands or otherwise exercising your artistic side.
Cavort: moving your body, plain and simple.
Commune: socializing with other people, whether that’s friends, family, or even strangers.
When self-care is an isolated activity we only turn to when we’re burnt out, the quality of our day to day lives is bound to suffer.
But exploring and prioritizing these four broad categories is a way to weave self-care into your routine. It’s a little less “mental breakdown in the bubble bath after a long work week”, and a little more actively taking care of your mind, heart, body, and spirit even as the week progresses.
Consume
While it’s incredibly easy to consume, it takes intentionality to do it in a way that actually benefits you.
Rather than doomscrolling, the task is to prioritize art, stories, and media that inspires, encourages, and relaxes you.
While I’m a big reader, I have a bad habit of scrolling at night. The endless short-form videos stimulate my already over-active brain, keeping me up later without even interesting me all that much. When I choose to spend that time reading, I might stay up just as late, but I’ll feel more relaxed and inspired. Plus, I’ll actually have a memory of the information I consumed, rather than the blur social media leaves.
When you go into consume mode to rest, what do you reach for? Ask yourself if it’s something that actually gives you rest.
Create
The fun thing about creativity is all the possibilities that fall under this broad category. Whether it’s a hobby, a side hustle, or your dream job, creating could mean just about anything.
If you create for work in any capacity, you’ll probably find it restful to try something completely different.
For example, I’m a singer-songwriter. While I love working on music, taking a creative break would likely mean experimenting with something else. On Wednesday, I dug a bunch of old fabric paints out and played around with making little shapes on a white sweatshirt. When it’s done, it’s gonna look messy, but fun.
I’m a firm believer that all human beings are creative. Creating is a natural human impulse, not a skill reserved only for a select few.
I’m the farthest thing from a visual artist, but trying out the medium helps me recharge my creative juices and reconnect with the playful side of art. Stepping into more of an amateur role now and then is good for you.
Cavort
Move your body!
Once again, there are endless possibilities that you can have fun with. The end goal is simply to move.
Many of us spend the majority of our time hunched over at desks or just standing still on our feet. As I write this, I’ve been sitting at my desk for about 45 minutes. When I get up, it will be to go to work, where I will mostly just stand up at the front desk for hours.
No wonder my back and feet hurt and I feel stiff all the time!
Whether or not you’re into exercise, incorporating more movement into your life will benefit you. The trick is finding something that’s fun for you: dancing, yoga, or hiking are all fun options.
If you already have a movement habit, it might also be helpful to switch it up now and then. I don’t spend a lot of time outdoors, so I took walk last time I visited the mountaintop studio on a sunny day. The change of pace was as lovely as the weather.
Commune
If you’ve been subscribed to me for a while, you probably know what I’m about to talk about: community!!!
In its simplest form, community just means being with other people. So, once again, there’s a lot of freedom to find creative ways to make this one work for you.
One of thing I’ve noticed in self-care discussions is socialization getting put on a back burner. There’s an assumption that when you need to rest, you gotta get away from people and have some alone time. Which is often true.
But there are two reasons not to neglect communing: first, sometimes being with other people is restful and, second, rest isn’t always exactly what you need.
I know, some people are introverts. I’m an introvert myself! But I’ve discovered an increasing need to socialize this year. Sometimes you don’t feel like being around people, but sometimes that’s exactly what you need in that moment.
Even for introverts, communing can be quite restful. Maybe you’re just in each others’ presence as you do one of the other “C”s: taking a walk, working in desperate creative projects, or watching a movie together. Don’t underestimate how restful it can be just to share space with the right people.
On the other hand, rest isn’t always what you need. I know it’s counterintuitive, but practical self-care is about more than relaxation.
Taking care of yourself can also mean tackling responsibilities, challenging yourself, or opening up to someone. Sometimes you don’t need a bath-bomb, you just need to confide in a friend; sometimes you don’t need to binge a show, you just need to get out of the house.
Building a life you don’t need a break from
The main takeaway from all this is that self-care isn’t all that helpful if it’s a vacation, not an active routine. You need to take care of yourself before the burn out knocks on the door—that way, you might prevent it.
Life is more than just work and breaks from work. Life is happening all the time. So, to build a life you don’t need as many breaks from, weave in routines that inspire, recharge, encourage, and challenge you to grow.
I’m trying to make time with friends a habitual past time, not a special occasion. I’m also trying to reconnect to the playful side of my creativity through various crafts and small, low commitment projects, and to move my body more through dance breaks and walks. Rather than cutting off my consumption, I’m trying to shift my habits to consume art, stories, and media that feel restful, inspiring, and human.
These are not frivolous. These are not distractions from work, productivity, and making change happen. Just the opposite: these routines are what help us do better work and make a positive impact.
More importantly, this is where life happens. That’s what all the work is for, not the other way around.